SEVEN TYPE OF STUDENTS IN A VETERINARY COLLEGE

Mark Twain once said, “All generalizations are false, including this one.” Of course, he was true but even that didn’t stop him from making this generalization. In fact, no one can escape from the lure of making generalizations & creating stereotypes. It renders a sense of wisdom to you. It means that the world around you is too ordinary & you are so tactful that you can generalize it into single statements. So everybody around us keeps on making generalizations of his own. A High school teacher says, “Every student in my class is a duffer.” Every Ordinary customers standing in the queue for electricity bills declares, “Every government employee is a slacker.” And the most favorite generalization of we all, “All the politicians are blood-sucking corrupts.” So let me put forward one generalization of my own, “Every Indian loves to make generalization.” So you must have got my point. Keeping on this tradition, I decided to generalize all the students in a veterinary college into seven types. These characters may be found in any other college too but I had the luck [Good or bad, depends upon your perception] to study at a veterinary college only so far. So here they are:

The Mother-Teresa student: He/she thinks of himself/herself as the Mother Teresa of animals. He/she is so much pained by the agony of diseased animals that he/she forgets everything else. Actually they belonged to a poetry class somewhere but ended up at the veterinary college. Usually girls suffer from this syndrome but these days even the new-age, soft-hearted boys have got a 33 percent reservation too. An attending vet [Professors in case of colleges] should always be beware of such characters because as I told you their pained mind forgets everything, they may even forget to administer a maintenance dose of a sedative.

The Know-it-all student: These kind of people are found everywhere in our society so why not a veterinary college. These are the people who claim that they are mortal incarnation of Wikipedia, all in flesh & bones. These people try to become a leader everywhere they are present. Anyone who has attended an Indian wedding will identify them. They are the self-designated wedding planners who are more excited than the bride’s father. So what do they do at a veterinary college? Whenever a case is being treated they will instruct the other students- “
You are not restraining the animal properly.
I think the dose of antibiotic you administered was wrong.
I think this is a case of swine-flu.
But one thing is sure, they will never be found doing anything themselves

The I-am-also-present student: these students are so caught in the obscurity of mediocrity that no one acknowledges their presence. They get through all the classes but not a single teacher knows their name. They are in fact experts at mediocrity whether in studies, sports or public life. Mostly boys belong to this type as no girl is ever ignored in our testosterone-driven society. So they try all strange endeavors for seeking attention which makes them the most important class. They will never get attention but everything happens only because of them.

The style icon: The type which is growing faster than others because of the ever-escalating consumerism.
How to identify them: Dressed in branded clothes, smelling best in the class [Because they never touch an animal] with an attitude which belongs to the video of a Bally Sagoo remix album.
Where to find them: Standing at the corners of clinics, hiding from the teachers, cracking lousy animal jokes, & checking out senior girls.
What to talk with them: Anything, latest movies, television reality shows, and new brands of mobile phones, anything except doses of medicines

The frustrated soul: these students suffer from the most potent disease of India-Frustration. They were the eternal bookworms who did nothing except study in their school days with only one aim: getting through PMT. But they failed & never got over it. A Veterinary College was always a second choice for them & they let everybody else to know this. They usually become friends of The Style Icon-type of students & blame everything in the veterinary profession. They are the reasons for the high sale of liquor & wine shops near the college.

The poor veterinarian: Believe me or not, still there are students in colleges who take veterinarian’s oath too seriously. They perform their every duty honestly & diligently. I don’t know much about them because I never dared to go near them. [They also never allowed me near them but it is a different story]. They are the poor souls who go back to the hostels late night after attending to a dying cow only to find their other classmates passed out after a late night party.

The Mr. India students: these are the students who are never found in the college. They are the invisible souls that is why the reference to Anil Kapoor movie. They are found at nearby Girls College, cinema halls, and snooker cafes at the college time. These students grow up to become the Mr. India Veterinary officers in the state animal husbandry department who are never visible at their hospital. But are busy in building their house, preparing their child for the exams, attending a neighbor’s wedding. I’ll get more information about them if I am able to see any of them ASAP.


So these were the various types of students that can be found in a veterinary college. I am a big fan of Mark Twain, so may be this generalization is also false. May be there are other types of students too. Do let me know any types that are missing here.
God bless you!